http://vimeo.com/31092562

By Jonathan Leeman | 5.7.2012

A local church is a group of Christians who regularly gather in Christ’s name to officially affirm and oversee one another’s membership in Jesus Christ and his kingdom through gospel preaching and gospel ordinances. That's a bit clunky, I know, but notice the five parts of this definition:

• a group of Christians;
• a regular gathering;
• a congregation-wide exercise of affirmation and oversight;
• the purpose of officially representing Christ and his rule on earth—they gather in his name;
• the use of preaching and ordinances for these purposes.

Just as a pastor’s pronouncement transforms a man and a woman into a married couple, so the latter four bullet points transform an ordinary group of Christians spending time together at the park—presto!—into a local church.

The gathering is important for a number of reasons. One is that it’s where we Christians “go public” to declare our highest allegiance. It’s the outpost or embassy, giving a public face to our future nation. And it’s where we bow before our king, only we call it worship. The Pharaohs of the world may oppose us, but God draws his people out of the nations to worship him. He will form his mighty congregation.

The gathering is also where our king enacts his rule through preaching, the ordinances, and discipline. The gospel sermon explains the “law” of our nation. It declares the name of our king and explains the sacrifice he made to become our king. It teaches us of his ways and confronts us in our disobedience. And it assures us of his imminent return.

Through baptism and the Lord’s Supper, the church waves the flag and dons the army uniform of our nation. It makes us visible. To be baptized is to identify ourselves with the name of the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit, as well as to identify our union with Christ’s death and resurrection (Matt. 28:19; Rom. 6:3-5). To receive the Lord’s Supper is to proclaim his death and our membership in his body (1 Cor. 11:26-29; cf. Matt. 26:26-29). God wants his people to be known and marked off. He wants a line between the church and the world.

What is the local church? It’s the institution which Jesus created and authorized to pronounce the gospel of the kingdom, to affirm gospel professors, to oversee their discipleship, and to expose impostors. All this means, we don’t “join” churches like we join clubs. We submit to them.

This article is excerpted from Church Membership: How the World Knows Who Represents Jesus(Crossway).

Por Jonathan Leeman

Si tu doctrina de la conversión no incluye el elemento corporativo, entonces le falta una parte esencial del todo. La cabeza del pacto está relacionada con el pueblo del pacto.

VERTICAL PRIMERO, HORIZONTAL INSEPARABLEMENTE SEGUNDO
Eso no quiere decir que debemos poner el elemento corporativo al frente. Uno pudiese coincidir con el conocido comentario de N.T. Wright acerca de la justificación “no tanto sobre la doctrina de la salvación como de la eclesiología, no tanto sobre la salvación como acerca de la iglesia” (Lo Que Realmente Dijo San Pablo, 119). Sin embargo, esto es un claro ejemplo, en la casi tan conocida perspectiva de Douglas Moo, de poner en segundo plano lo que el Nuevo Testamento prioriza y viceversa (citado en D.A. Carson, “Fe y Fidelidad”).

No puede haber verdadera reconciliación entre los seres humanos hasta que los individuos pecadores se reconcilien previamente con Dios. Lo horizontal, necesariamente, sigue a lo vertical. La eclesiología sigue; indefectiblemente, a la soteriología. Esto equivale a decir que el elemento corporativo no debe ser lo primero, a menos, que perdamos la perspectiva.

Sin embargo, debe estar presente. De hecho, el elemento corporativo debe permanecer dentro de la estructura misma de la conversión. Nuestra unidad corporativa en Cristo no es tan solo una consecuencia de la conversión sino que es parte de ella misma. Ser reconciliado con el pueblo de Dios es distinto de, pero al mismo tiempo, inseparable de ser reconciliado con Dios.

A veces nuestro énfasis se pierde en la mecánica de la conversión, como cuando nuestras discusiones doctrinales no van más allá de la relación entre la soberanía divina y la responsabilidad humana o de la necesidad del arrepentimiento y de la fe. No obstante, una verdadera comprensión de la conversión debe incluir también una explicación de que nos estamos moviendo desde y hacia. Ser convertido implica ser pasado de muerte a vida, desde el dominio de las tinieblas al dominio de la luz. Y esto incluye ser movido desde el desamparo a pertenecer a un pueblo, de ser una oveja descarriada a pertenecer a la manada, de ser algo desmembrado a ser miembro de un cuerpo.

Observa las declaraciones paralelas de Pedro:
Antes no erais pueblo, ahora sois pueblo de Dios;
Antes no habían recibido misericordia, pero ahora habéis alcanzado misericordia (1ª P 2:10)
Recibir misericordia (reconciliación vertical) es simultáneo a convertirse en un pueblo (reconciliación horizontal). Dios tiene misericordia de nosotros perdonando nuestros pecados, y una consecuencia necesaria de ello, es la inclusión en su pueblo.

NATURALEZA CORPORATIVA DE LOS PACTOS
De hecho, el elemento social de nuestra conversión se puede apreciar observando apenas la estructura del pacto en la Biblia. Es cierto que todos los pactos del Antiguo Testamento encuentran su cumplimiento en la simiente (en singular) de Abraham. Jesús es el nuevo Israel. Sin embargo, también es cierto que todo lo que está unido a Cristo a través de la nueva alianza también se convierte en el Israel de Dios y la simiente (en plural) de Abraham (Gálatas 3:29; 6:16).
En otras palabras, la cabeza del pacto trae consigo, por definición, al pueblo del pacto (ver Rom. 5:12 y ss). Pertenecer al nuevo pacto, entonces, es pertenecer a un pueblo.

No sorprende entonces que las promesas del Antiguo Testamento de un nuevo pacto estén, por tanto, relacionadas a un pueblo: “Ya no tendrá nadie que enseñar a su prójimo, ni dirá nadie a su hermano: “¡Conoce al SEÑOR!”, porque todos, desde el más pequeño hasta el más grande, me conocerán —afirma el SEÑOR—. Yo les perdonaré su iniquidad, y nunca más me acordaré de sus pecados” (Jer. 31:34)

VERTICALIDAD Y HORIZONTALIDAD EN EFESIOS 2
Toda la historia se exhibe maravillosamente en Efesios 2. Los versículos del 1 al 10 explican el perdón y la reconciliación vertical con Dios: "Porque por gracia sois salvos." Los versículos del 11 al 20 presentan, acto seguido, la reconciliación horizontal: "Porque él es nuestra paz, que nos ha hecho uno y se ha roto en su carne el muro que los separaba, la enemistad "(v. 14).

Observa que la acción del versículo 14 está en tiempo pasado. Cristo ya ha hecho a los Judíos y a los Gentiles un solo pueblo. No hay imperativo aquí. Pablo no está ordenando a sus lectores que busquen la unidad. Antes bien, él está hablando en modo indicativo. Esto es lo que ellos son porque Dios lo ha hecho, y Dios lo hizo en el mismo lugar que logró la reconciliación vertical, en la cruz de Cristo (véase también la relación entre indicativo e imperativo en Efe. 4:1-6)

En virtud del nuevo pacto de Cristo, la unidad corporativa pertenece al modo indicativo de la conversión. Ser convertido es ser hecho un miembro del cuerpo de Cristo. Nuestra nueva identidad contiene un elemento eclesial. Cristo nos ha hecho personas eclesiales.

Aquí está una imagen sencilla. Supongamos que mamá y papá van hasta el orfanato para adoptar un hijo, traerlo a casa y colocarlo en la mesa de la familia con un nuevo conjunto de hermanos y hermanas. Pero ser un hijo no es lo mismo que ser un hermano. La filiación es lo primero. Sin embargo, la hermandad, necesariamente, le sigue.
Es como decir que la conversión nos califica para una foto de familia.

APLICACIÓN PERSONAL: ¡ÚNETE A UNA IGLESIA!
¿Cuál es la aplicación para nuestras vidas? Simplemente: ¡Únete a una iglesia!
Usted ha sido hecho justo, por lo tanto, debe ser justo. Usted ha sido hecho miembro de Su cuerpo, por lo que debe unirse a un cuerpo real. Usted ha hecho uno, así que debe ser uno con un grupo real de cristianos.

APLICACIÓN CORPORATIVA: ASUME LA MECÁNICA CORRECTA
¿Qué significa esto para nuestras iglesias? Esto significa que conseguir los antes mencionados mecanismos verdaderos de conversión en nuestra doctrina es de gran importancia. Queremos tener concepciones fuertes tanto de la soberanía divina como de la responsabilidad humana, tanto del arrepentimiento como de la fe. Los desequilibrios aquí darán lugar a una iglesia desequilibrada y enferma. Lo que se pone en la cazuela de la conversión se convertirá en la sopa de la iglesia.

Si tu doctrina de la conversión carece de una fuerte concepción de la soberanía de Dios, tu predicación y tu evangelización correrán el riesgo de convertirse en manipuladoras y complacientes al hombre. Tu enfoque hacia el liderazgo es más que probable que derive en un enfoque pragmático. Correrás el riesgo de quemarte a ti mismo y a tu congregación con un horario sobrecargado de actividades. Tus prácticas de membresía se convertirán en derechos o beneficios en base a obras (como un club de campo). Tus prácticas de rendición de cuentas y de disciplina se desvanecerán por completo. Vas a poner en riesgo la santidad. La lista continúa.

Si tu doctrina de la conversión carece de una fuerte concepción de la responsabilidad humana, es más que probable que hagas una mala mayordomía de tus propios dones, así como los dones de tu congregación. Es más que probable que usted caiga en tentaciones hacia la complacencia en la evangelización y en la preparación de sermones. Puede ser menos propenso a comunicar el amor y la compasión hacia los que hieren. Usted puede acercarse a los demás con aspecto grave o dando palmaditas, sin involucrarse realmente. Usted puede sufrir de una vida de oración débil, por lo que perderá todas las bendiciones que podrían ser suyas. Pone en riesgo el amor. La lista continúa.

Si tu doctrina de la conversión carece de una fuerte concepción del arrepentimiento, te apresurarás a ofrecer una garantía de la salvación, y serás lento para pedirle a la gente que asuma el costo de seguir a Cristo. Usted será más tolerante con lo mundano y con la división en la iglesia, y los miembros de la iglesia sólo pueden tolerar estas cosas porque muchos de ellos permanecerán en las aguas poco profundas de la fe. El nominalismo también será más común, porque la gracia es barata. En general, a la iglesia le gustará mucho cantar a Cristo como Salvador, pero no tanto acerca de Cristo como Señor, ya no se verá muy diferente al resto del mundo.

Si tu doctrina de la conversión carece de una fuerte concepción de la fe, tendrás una iglesia llena legalistas ansiosos, autojustificados y complacientes de hombres. Los miembros más disciplinados de la iglesia se sienten, auto-engañándose, bien consigo mismos, mientras que los miembros menos disciplinados, en silencio, esconden su pecado secreto y cada vez aprenden a condenarse a sí mismos y a molestar a los otros. La transparencia será algo raro; siendo lo común la hipocresía. Los no conversos y los pródigos percibirán que no se siente la calidez y la compasión de la verdadera gracia. Las preferencias culturales se confundirán con la ley. A la iglesia le va a gustar cantar acerca de las órdenes de marcha de Cristo Rey, pero no tanto sobre un Cordero manchado de sangre, un Cordero que fue inmolado por ellos.

Estoy exagerando, por supuesto. Las cosas no ocurren exactamente así. Pero la idea básica en todos estos ejemplos es mostrar la estrecha conexión entre la conversión y la iglesia. Si la conversión implica necesariamente un elemento corporativo, o, más concretamente, si las conversiones individuales producen esencialmente un pueblo unido, todo lo demás que permanezca en tu doctrina de la conversión afectará dramáticamente el tipo de iglesia que
¿Quieres una iglesia saludable? Entonces, trabaja en tu doctrina de la conversión, y enseña todas las partes de la misma a tu gente. Asegúrese, además, que las estructuras y programas de su iglesia sean coherentes con esta doctrina multifacética y de gran alcance.

Jonathan Leeman, un miembro de la Iglesia Bautista Capitol Hill, es el director editorial de 9Marks y el autor de la Membresía de la Iglesia: ¿Cómo sabe el mundo quién pertenece Jesús y a la Disciplina de la Iglesia?: ¿Cómo protege la Iglesia el nombre de Jesús? (ambos en Crossway, abril 2012 ).

http://es.9marks.org/journal/el-componente-corporativo-de-la-conversi%C3%B3n

Book Review: Redeeming Church Conflicts By David V. Edling, Tara Klena Barthel
Reviewed by Matt Smethurst Print
Baker Books, 2012.
256 pages. $16.99

Conflict isn’t far from your church. I don’t simply mean that it’s in that congregation down the street—I mean it’s coming to yours.

AN EXCELLENT PRIMER ON CHURCH CONFLICT
Tara Barthel and David Edling have written an excellent primer on church conflict titled Redeeming Church Conflicts: Turning Crisis into Compassion and Care. With years of experience in conflict mediation through Peacemaker Ministries, they are well qualified to speak to this issue.

The book is structured around the “Acts 15 Model for Redeeming Church Conflicts”—a four-stage rubric based on the flow of Luke’s narrative: Perspective (15:2-4), Discernment (15:5-7a), Leadership (15:7-35), and Biblical Response (15:11, 16-18). Real-life case studies are interspersed throughout the book, and each chapter concludes with lists of “Questions for Reflection” and “Recommended Resources for Further Study.” Barthel and Edling suggest we have much to learn from Luke’s account of the meeting in Jerusalem “to redeem the early church’s first major conflict” (78).

SEVERAL STRENGTHS
The strengths of Redeeming Church Conflicts are many. Here are five that particularly stood out to me:
1. The Primacy of God’s Word
In their endeavor to make sense of church conflicts, Barthel and Edling unfailingly gravitate to the Bible. It’s evident that Scripture isn’t simply their confessional authority, but their functional authority, too. They trust it deeply.
Apart from a tenacious loyalty to God’s word, individuals and churches have little hope for meaningful resolution. Danger abounds when Christians in conflicted churches begin to act in accordance with their emotions “rather than being guided and ruled by God’s Word” (25).

2. The Centrality of the Gospel
Gospel amnesia is a sure harbinger of trouble, distorting our focus and leading us to let circumstances outweigh Calvary. Far from being some token gospel-centered nod, Barthel and Edling repeatedly insist that conflicted churches can have hope for restoration only when the gospel is “recaptured and thrust to the forefront” (79).

In fact, after decades of experience the authors can write: “We are unaware of any church that has successfully resolved its churchwide conflicts without first going back to the basics of what the gospel message is, its implications for faith and life, and God’s statement of purpose and mission for his church” (79-80). God has indeed loved and forgiven us far more than we’ll ever be called to love and forgive another. The ultimate foundation for all biblical responses to church conflict, then, is gospel grace.

3. The Necessity of Humility
Reconciliation is elusive apart from humility. Conflict, on the other hand, will endure as long as those involved remain curved in on themselves. Genuine humility calls us to put our trust in God rather than in our own shifty hearts (Prov. 3:5-6).

Sin appears deceptively small in its crouched state (Gen. 4:7), and pride is no exception. But it’s lethal among God’s people:
Pride drives us to overlook our own sin while, for the sake of winning, we quickly look for and find the faults of others. Pride motivates us to guard the reputation of the church to outsiders, even a false reputation, more than we guard the relationships already within the church. Pride skews our focus to numeric growth in attendance and financial donations, rather than to the maturing of faithful, involved members of the church. (48)

It’s easy to let one’s guard down around family. As brothers and sisters in the church, however, we must realize that “no issue at the center of a conflict outweighs God’s call to put relationships in Christ above all other considerations” (200). Only humility can lead one to think like this.

4. The Context of Eternity
Conflicts flourish as eternal vision fades. We must strive, then, to examine our conflicts through the lens of eternity. Otherwise, as Ed Welch puts it, God becomes small as people become big.
Throughout the book, Barthel and Edling pull back the curtain of eternity and urge us to reorient our perspective accordingly.

Apart from right worship, we will love something or someone more than God as temporal concerns triumph over the unseen concerns of faith. Apart from right worship, we will willingly sacrifice other people on the altar of desires—money, property, worship styles, ministry leaders, “winning this fight,” “being right,” or “getting my way.” Only right worship can effectively foster deep and lasting heart and attitude changes that prioritize the value of eternal grace. (176)

Zooming out from our immediate issues enables us to see the eternal reality of our relationships. Consider your future with that difficult brother or sister: before long, you’ll be worshiping a common Savior in perfect unity. So why would you pour fuel on the fire of conflict now?

An eternal perspective is essential for helping us to live out our identity in Christ and to treat others in accordance with theirs.

5. The Preciousness of God’s Glory
According to Barthel and Edling, “How can I please and honor the Lord in my church’s present conflicts?” (175) is the question of supreme importance. And they are exactly right.

I wonder how many church conflicts arise out of a fundamental misunderstanding regarding what a church is. Infighting, for example, begins to make little sense once we grasp that the church is an earthly body designed to display heavenly unity. Indeed, the purpose of the church is to showcase God’s glory to a watching world. His character is at stake, then, even in the smallest of skirmishes.

Ultimately, church conflicts are about Jesus. His reputation in the world rests largely with us. We ought to be exceedingly slow, then, to fight with those whom he has forgiven and war with those whom he has welcomed.

A COUPLE MINOR QUBBLES
The strengths of Redeeming Church Conflicts far outweigh its shortcomings. Nevertheless, I have a couple minor misgivings that are perhaps worth noting.

First, the authors assert that Acts 15 stands as “a paradigmatic and normative model for the church today” (21). Well, okay, but that chapter’s major players happen to be authoritative apostles whose office and role don’t parallel my pastor or yours. As inspired Scripture, Acts 15 is immensely profitable; I’m just not convinced it’s a prescriptive, step-by-step model for handling church conflict, as Barthel and Edling argue (20-21).

Second, Barthel and Edling appear to assume that congregational and elder-led models of polity are mutually exclusive (14, 74). This, I think, is a false and unfortunate dichotomy. Congregationalism in the context of elder leadershipis both viable and biblical.

DON’T WAIT UNTIL YOU’RE IN A CONFLICT—READ AND BENEFIT NOW
Barthel and Edling have done the church a vital service in applying biblical counseling principles to the realm of congregational conflict. Don’t wait until you find yourself in a relational mess to consult this helpful resource; read and benefit now.

As the authors remind us, the “call to redeem our church conflicts will continue until the day the Lord returns and makes us perfect” (221). Indeed. Come, Lord Jesus!

Matt Smethurst is an MDiv student at The Southern Baptist Theological Seminary and an assistant editor for The Gospel Coalition. He and his wife Maghan have one child and live in Louisville, Kentucky, where they are members of Third Avenue Baptist Church.

Original Post: http://www.9marks.org/books/book-review-redeeming-church-conflicts
 

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Article by Scott Thomas

I made a terrible decision over ten years ago when I suddenly resigned from a church as its lead pastor after a six-month-long, emotionally intense battle with another elder. It is not always wrong to resign, but it always wrong to resign in isolation. I did not feel that I had anyone who could objectively coach me through this decision.

I had friends around me who were directly affected by the situation, but I did not have someone with the three ingredients of a coach: 1) someone I could trust, 2) someone who would care, 3) and someone who could help. So, I left and the problems followed me. It was then that I decided to get a coach and I have not made another major decision in isolation. I have several men whom I can call. My wife calls them my “dudes.” If I am wrestling with an issue, she says, “Call your dudes.” In her words, every leader needs some dudes.

“ You cannot just train someone how to do something. You have to train them who to be.”

Every leader needs a coach. Paul was a coach to a young disciple, leader, and protégé named Timothy. From a prison, Paul wrote what is regarded as his last public letter to Timothy. It is a treatise on leadership development. Paul proclaimed the gospel and God saved Timothy. Timothy grew in his faith and Paul took Timothy under his care and they ministered together for many years. In the letter found in 2 Timothy, Paul is handing off or entrusting this ministry to Timothy’s oversight. He could only do so because of the years of coaching that took place between them. Gospel Coaching is leadership development with focused attention on a disciple’s personal, spiritual, and missional aspects of life. You cannot just train someone how to do something; you have to train them who to be. Gospel Coaching does both.

Leadership is lonely. Church leadership is even lonelier because other people’s problems become the leader’s problems, and the leader naturally ignores the very real and acute personal, spiritual, and missional challenges they are facing. Chapters 1 and 2 of 2 Timothy give us three insights into how a Gospel Coach functions in the life of another leader.

Grace Strengthens Leaders It is grace that strengthens leaders, not their abilities, personalities or skills. Paul reminds Timothy of God’s grace (1:2) that continually strengthens him (2:1) and Paul reminds Timothy of his own grace extended without merit in three specific ways.

Paul prayed for Timothy constantly (1:3),Paul was compassionate toward Timothy’s needs (1:4), andPaul infused faith that rested in the gospel as Timothy’s empowerment (1:4–7). Paul didn’t just try to make Timothy feel good about himself, but he encouraged him to be more dependent upon the gospel (1:8–9). Gospel-Entrusted Leaders Leaders are entrusted with the gospel, not because they are trustworthy, but because of a holy calling of God (1:9–11). Leaders are called to “guard the gospel” with every fiber of their being (1:12–14). Leaders are also called to entrust that gospel to other faithful disciples (2:2). We develop leaders by the gospel and not just skill development. Gospel Coaching is a Spirit-empowered relationship where both participants are allowing the gospel to transform their lives completely (1:14).

Glory-Giving Leaders Leaders often seek glory for themselves when they operate outside of the gospel. But only God deserves any glory. Often, leaders are called to glorify God in the midst of personal or ministerial suffering. A Gospel Coach shares in that suffering (with Jesus and with the other person) “for the gospel by the power of God” (1:8). Paul entreats Timothy to “share in suffering as a good soldier of Christ Jesus,” as an athlete and as a farmer. Jesus is the soldier (2:3) who defeated Satan, sin, and death. Jesus is the athlete (2:5) who competed within the rules by living without sin. Jesus is the farmer (2:6) who sowed his own seed into the grave and God raised him up as the firstfruits of all believers (1 Cor. 15:20, 23). A Gospel Coach reminds the disciple of the glory that only belongs to God—no matter how well they performed. A Gospel Coach shares in the suffering with the disciple. The coach does this by proclaiming the good news of the One who suffered on our behalf for the glory of God.

Scott’s new book, Gospel Coach: Shepherding Leaders to Glorify God just hit digital and physical store shelves.

by Al Mohler from http://www.albertmohler.com/

Is President Obama’s “evolution” on same sex marriage finally complete? His call for the legalization of same-sex marriage yesterday is an historic and tragic milestone. An incumbent President of the United States has now called for a transformation of civilization’s central institution. And yet, no observer of this president could be surprised. The arrival of this announcement was only a matter of time. The White House confirmed this within hours of the President’s announcement. As The New York Times reported on May 10, “Advisers say now that Mr. Obama had intended since early this year to define his position sometime before Democrats nominate him for re-election in September.”

Previous news reports indicated that the 2012 platform for the Democratic Party would likely include a call for same-sex marriage. The pressure was on the White House, with the President caught in an awkward and embarrassing situation in which major figures on both sides of the controversy believed that his public position did not reflect his true convictions.

President Obama and the Gay Rights Movement (Audio) In December of 2010, the President told Jake Tapper of ABC News, “My feelings about this are constantly evolving.” Last October, he told George Stephanopoulos, “I’m still working on it.” As Dan Amira of New York magazine summarized that comment, “President Obama won’t say if he’ll stop pretending to oppose gay marriage before the election.”

In August of 2008, running for the White House, President Obama had said: “I believe that marriage is the union between a man and a woman. Now, for me as a Christian — for me — for me as a Christian, it is also a sacred union. God’s in the mix.”

In February of 1996, running for state office in Illinois, Obama signed a letter to a homosexual newspaper in Chicago that included the statement, “I favor legalizing same-sex marriages, and would fight efforts to prohibit such marriages.” So, his statement today puts him back where he was on the record as recently as 1996 — calling for the legalization of same-sex marriage.

The President’s position since 2008 has been untenable. Having endorsed same-sex marriage when running for office in 1996, he evidently changed his position as he ran for the U. S. Senate in 2004 and for president in 2008. Since then, his language and his actions have been contradictory. He has said that he opposes same-sex marriage, but he ordered his Attorney General not to defend the Defense of Marriage Act. Officials in his administration openly advocated same-sex marriage, even as the President dropped hint after hint that he did as well. The President found himself facing the fact that he would have to declare himself one way or the other on the question as the 2012 election unfolded — so now we know.

Why now? The Washington Post reports that he was under intense pressure from many Democrats, including his major campaign fundraisers. According to the paper’s report, one in six of the President’s major “bundlers,” or fundraisers, is a self-identified homosexual.

The immediate pressure came after Vice President Joe Biden said last Sunday that he was “completely comfortable” with same-sex marriage. The Vice President’s statement on the issue delivered full support for same-sex marriage. On Monday, Secretary of Education Arne Duncan followed Biden’s lead.
The President was under intense pressure within his party, but the issue quickly turned to an issue of presidential character. No one made this point more directly than Ruth Marcus of The Washington Post, in a column that ran yesterday morning. “Same-sex marriage is turning into a test of character and leadership for President Obama,” she wrote, “Does he favor it, or doesn’t he? In the wake of Vice President Biden’s remarks supportive of marriage equality, the continued presidential equivocation makes Obama look weak and evasive”
She wasn’t finished. “The longer Obama waits, the worse he looks. The president’s first stall tactic, that he is ‘evolving’ on the issue, doesn’t cut it anymore. Even Darwin would have lost patience by now. His second approach, the not-gonna-make-news-for-you-today cop-out, has also worn thin. If you wonder whether the president actually opposes same-sex marriage, doesn’t evolution imply change? And if you think perhaps he’s still conflicted — well, that’s hardly an advertisement to be leader of the free world. At this point, Obama’s reticence is looking cowardly.”

The President could probably survive that kind of criticism from conservatives, but not from liberals. Clearly, he had to clarify his position.

The President chose to make his statement in an interview with ABC. His statement was really not a serious argument for the legalization of same-sex marriage, however. He spoke of the issue as if it is a matter of personal taste.He told ABC’s Robin Roberts that “at a certain point I’ve just concluded that for me personally it is important for me to go ahead and affirm that I think same-sex couples should be able to get married.”
He made his statement the day after voters in North Carolina voted overwhelmingly in support of defining marriage as the union of one man and one woman — the 30th state to have taken such action.
Honesty is the best policy, and the President has now made his position clear. He is again for what he was until today against, but that was only after he was for it before. The American people will have to unravel that as an issue of character. He is hardly the first politician to find himself holding to an “evolving” position on an issue of fundamental importance. Most politicians, however, do their best to avoid the kind of situation in which the President found himself on this issue.

In any event, the fact remains that the President of the United States has now put himself publicly on the line for the radical redefinition of marriage, subverting society’s most central institution.

This is a sad day for America, but the President’s statement was not a surprise. Given the political context he faced, the only question was when the President would make his public statement of endorsement for the legalization of same-sex marriage. We now know the answer to that question.

This is a sad day for marriage, but now we know the truth.

Why Going to Church Is Important, Part 1 March 26th, 2012

Some people claim to be Christians but don’t attend church. But if you really love God, you will love His people and long to be with them.
“Well, I haven’t found a church I like yet, and I work and Sunday is my only day off!” The Bible indeed commands us to go to church, and—even more—to be a functioning part of it.
Hebrews 10:24–25 says, “And let us consider one another in order to stir up love and good works, not forsaking the assembling of ourselves together, as is the manner of some, but exhorting one another, and so much the more as you see the Day approaching.”
I like the way the New Living Translation puts it: “Think of ways to encourage one another to outbursts of love and good deeds. And let us not neglect our meeting together, as some people do, but encourage and warn each other, especially now that the day of his coming back again is drawing near.”
The Bible does not say: Don’t forsake the assembling of yourselves together unless Sunday is your only day off…or unless you want to run in a triathlon…or unless it’s a great beach day, in which case you are excused, because you just don’t need fellowship as much as other Christians do.
Yes, if you love God, you will love His people and long to be with them. If you don’t really love God, you won’t love His people. Some will say “I’m so over the church; people are critical and judgmental. It’s so full of hypocrites!” My response to that is: There is always room for one more!    Read more....

How Cohabitation Differs from Marriage
The Facts Living together leads to living alone In the mid-1960s, only five per cent of single women lived with a man before getting married. By the 1990s, about 70 per cent did so.l Some people think that living together will lead automatically to marriage, but that often is not the case. Many cohabitations break up. For many other couples, cohabitation is viewed as an alternative to marriage rather than a preparation for it. However, this alternative is less likely than marriage to lead to a long-term stable commitment.

Stability Cohabiting relationships are fragile. They are always more likely to break up than marriages entered into at the same time, regardless of age or income. On average, cohabitations last less than two years before breaking up or converting to marriage. Less than four per cent of cohabitations last for ten years or more. 2 Cohabiting also influences later marriages. The more often and the longer that men and women cohabit, the more likely they are to divorce later. 3

Cheating Both men and women in cohabiting relationships are more likely to be unfaithful to their partners than married people. 4

Economics At all socio-economic levels, cohabiting couples accumulate less wealth than married couples. 5 Married men earn 10 to 40 percent more than single or cohabiting men, and they are more successful in their careers, particularly when they become fathers. 6 Married women without children earn about the same as childless single or cohabiting women. All women who take time out of employment to have children lose some earning power-whether they are married or not. 7 However, cohabiting and lone mothers often lack access to the father's income, making it more difficult to balance their caring responsibilities with their careers.

Health Cohabitants have more health problems than married people, probably because cohabitants put up with behaviour in their partners which husbands and wives would discourage, particularly regarding smoking, alcohol and substance abuse. 8 Cohabitants are also much more likely to suffer from depression than married people. 9

Domestic violence Women in cohabiting relationships are more likely than wives to be abused. In one study, marital status was the strongest predictor of abuse-ahead of race, age, education or housing conditions. 10

References:
1 Haskey, J., 'Trends in marriage and cohabitation: The decline in marriage and the changing pattern of living in partnerships', Population Trends, Vol. 80, 1995, pp. 421-29.
2 Ermisch, J. and Francesconi, M., Cohabitation in Great Britain: Not for Long, but Here to Stay, Institute for Social and Economic Research, University of Essex, 1998; Ermisch, J., Pre-marital Cohabitation, Childbearing and the Creation of One-Parent Families, ESRC Research Centre on Micro-social Change, Paper Number 95-17, 1995, from British Household Panel Study.
3 Waite, L. and Gallagher, M., The Case for Marriage: Why Married People are Happier, Healthier, and Better Off Financially, New York: Doubleday, 2000, p. 46.
4 Wellings, K., Field, J., Johnson, and A., Wadsworth, J., Sexual Behaviour in Britain: The National Survey of Sexual Attitudes and Lifestyles, London: Penguin Books, 1994, p. 116; Steinhaiser, J., 'No marriage, no apologies', New York Times, 6 July 1995. R
5 Waite and Gallagher, Case for Marriage, 2000, pp. 111-14.
6 Kiernan, K. and Mueller, G., The Divorced and Who Divorces?, CASEpaper CASE/7, 1998, Centre for Analysis of Social Exclusion, May 1998; Waite, L.J., 'Does marriage matter?', Demography, Vol. 32, No. 4, 1995, pp. 483-507; Daniel, K., 'The marriage premium', in Tommasi, M. and Ierulli, K. (eds.), The New Economics of Human Behaviour, Cambridge UK: Cambridge University Press, 1996; Korenman, S.D. and Neumark, D., Does Marriage Really Make Men More Productive?, Finance and Economics Discussion Series, No. 29, Washington DC: Division of Research and Statistics, Federal Reserve Board, May 1988; and Sarantakos, S., Living Together in Australia, Melbourne: Longman Cheshire, 1984.
7 Joshi, H., Paci, P., and Waldfogel, J., 'The wages of motherhood: Better or worse?', Cambridge Journal of Economics, vol. 23, 1999, pp. 543-64.
8 Sarantakos, S., Living Together in Australia, 1984, p. 138; Horwitz, A.V. and White, H.R., 'The relationship of cohabitation and mental health: a study of a young adult cohort', Journal of Marriage and the Family, Vol. 60, 1998, pp. 505-14. Sarantakos, S., Living Together in Australia, 1984.
9 Mastekaasa, A., 'Marital status, distress and well-being: an international comparison', Journal of Comparative Family Studies, Vol. 25, No. 2, 1994, p. 183; Kurdek, L.A., 'The relations between reported well-being and divorce history, availability of a proximate adult, and gender', Journal of Marriage and the Family, Vol. 53, February 1991, pp. 71-78; Robins, L. and Reiger, D., Psychiatric Disorders in America, New York: Free Press, 1990; Horwitz and White, 'The relationship of cohabitation and mental health', 1998.
10 Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, Morbidity and Mortality Weekly Report 43, No. 8, Washington DC: US Government Printing Office, 4 March 1994.

 If you are allowing your children to read or go see the Hunger Games, this article is a must read.  The movie is compelling and it compels every person/parent into a Biblical discussion about ethics.  Be prepared!

Christians and The Hunger Games by Douglas Wilson 

http://www.credenda.org/index.php/Reviews/christians-and-the-hunger-games.html

1. Realize that authentic joy in God is a gift.
2. Realize that joy must be fought for relentlessly.
3. Resolve to attack all known sin in your life.
4. Learn the secret of gutsy guilt - how to fight like a justified sinner.
5. Realize that the battle is primarily a fight to see God for who he is.
6. Meditate on the Word of God day and night.
7. Pray earnestly and continually for open heart-eyes and an inclination for God.
8. Learn to preach to yourself rather than listen to yourself.
9. Spend time with God-saturated people who help you see God and fight the fight.
10. Be patient in the night of God's seeming absence.
11. Get the rest and exercise proper diet that your body was designed by God to have.
12. Make a proper use of God's revelation in nature.
13. Read great books about God and biographies of great saints.
14. Do the hard and loving thing for the sake of others (witness and mercy).
15. Get a global vision for the cause of Christ and pour yourself out for the unreached.

© Desiring God By John Piper. © Desiring God. Website: desiringGod.org

Men, you don’t have to be rich and you don’t have to climb corporate ladders. You don’t have to fix cars and grow a beard. But it’s time to take a little initiative–in the church, with your career, and with women. Stop circling around and start going somewhere. It’s probably a good idea to be more like your grandpa and less like Captain Jack Sparrow. Even less like Peter Pan. Show some godly ambition. Take some risks. Stop looking for play dates and–unless God is calling you to greater service through singleness–start looking for a wife. 

 ________________________________________________________________________

Why men are in trouble By William J. Bennett,

CNN Contributor updated 10:27 AM EST, Tue October 4, 2011

http://www.cnn.com/2011/10/04/opinion/bennett-men-in-trouble/index.html 

 (CNN) -- For the first time in history, women are better educated, more ambitious and arguably more successful than men.
Now, society has rightly celebrated the ascension of one sex. We said, "You go girl," and they went. We celebrate the ascension of women but what will we do about what appears to be the very real decline of the other sex?

The data does not bode well for men. In 1970, men earned 60% of all college degrees. In 1980, the figure fell to 50%, by 2006 it was 43%. Women now surpass men in college degrees by almost three to two. Women's earnings grew 44% in real dollars from 1970 to 2007, compared with 6% growth for men.

William J. Bennett In 1950, 5% of men at the prime working age were unemployed. As of last year, 20% were not working, the highest ever recorded. Men still maintain a majority of the highest paid and most powerful occupations, but women are catching them and will soon be passing them if this trend continues.

The warning signs for men stretch far beyond their wallets. Men are more distant from a family or their children then they have ever been. The out-of-wedlock birthrate is more than 40% in America. In 1960, only 11% of children in the U.S. lived apart from their fathers. In 2010, that share had risen to 27%. Men are also less religious than ever before. According to Gallup polling, 39% of men reported attending church regularly in 2010, compared to 47% of women.

If you don't believe the numbers, just ask young women about men today. You will find them talking about prolonged adolescence and men who refuse to grow up. I've heard too many young women asking, "Where are the decent single men?" There is a maturity deficit among men out there, and men are falling behind.

This decline in founding virtues -- work, marriage, and religion -- has caught the eye of social commentators from all corners. In her seminal article, "The End of Men," Hanna Rosin unearthed the unprecedented role reversal that is taking place today. "Man has been the dominant sex since, well, the dawn of mankind. But for the first time in human history, that is changing—and with shocking speed," writes Rosin. The changes in modern labor -- from backs to brains -- have catapulted women to the top of the work force, leaving men in their dust.

Hanna Rosin: Are women leaving men behind?

Man's response has been pathetic. Today, 18-to- 34-year-old men spend more time playing video games a day than 12-to- 17-year-old boys. While women are graduating college and finding good jobs, too many men are not going to work, not getting married and not raising families. Women are beginning to take the place of men in many ways. This has led some to ask: do we even need men?

So what's wrong? Increasingly, the messages to boys about what it means to be a man are confusing. The machismo of the street gang calls out with a swagger. Video games, television and music offer dubious lessons to boys who have been abandoned by their fathers. Some coaches and drill sergeants bark, "What kind of man are you?" but don't explain.

Movies are filled with stories of men who refuse to grow up and refuse to take responsibility in relationships. Men, some obsessed with sex, treat women as toys to be discarded when things get complicated. Through all these different and conflicting signals, our boys must decipher what it means to be a man, and for many of them it is harder to figure out.

For boys to become men, they need to be guided through advice, habit, instruction, example and correction. It is true in all ages. Someone once characterized the two essential questions Plato posed as: Who teaches the children, and what do we teach them? Each generation of men and women have an obligation to teach the younger males (and females of course) coming behind them. William Wordsworth said, "What we have loved, others will love, and we will teach them how." When they fail in that obligation, trouble surely follows.
We need to respond to this culture that sends confusing signals to young men, a culture that is agnostic about what it wants men to be, with a clear and achievable notion of manhood.

The Founding Fathers believed, and the evidence still shows, that industriousness, marriage and religion are a very important basis for male empowerment and achievement. We may need to say to a number of our twenty-something men, "Get off the video games five hours a day, get yourself together, get a challenging job and get married." It's time for men to man up.

It is lengthy, but well worth the read…thanks Mark!

Here are Seventeen reminders for leaders:

1. Tough decisions only get tougher.
You are only one decision away from a totally different life. I believe that. One change in diet or exercise can radically change your health status. One change in spiritual disciplines can open up new dimensions of grace and power. One change in a relationship can lead to intimacy. What do you need to stop doing or start doing? Your destiny isn’t a mystery. Your destiny is the cumulative decisions you make. What tough decision do you need to make? What are you waiting for?

2. Negativity is cancer. Kill it or it will kill you.
I am wide open to rebuke. Constructive criticism is the avenue to excellence. But I have zero tolerance for negativity. How do you stop negativity? Positivity. One of the ways we do that at NCC is sharing wins before every meeting. It reminds us that God is moving and we get to be part of it. Sharing wins creates positive energy. And it’s positivity that gives us the energy we need to deal with negativity. Don’t let one staff member, one board member or one small group member hijack what God has called you to captain.

3. No Margin = No Vision.
If you try to be all things to all people you’ll become nothing to nobody. I have focus days and meeting days. I meet with people on my meeting days. I meet with God on my focus days. I need days where there is nothing on my agenda so I can read or write, dream or rest. The lack of margin will kill your creativity. If you don’t control your calendar, your calendar will control you. It starts with establishing boundaries. Then you need to guard against the Messiah complex.
You can’t save everybody. In fact, you can’t save anybody. You aren’t doing anybody any favors if you make yourself available to everybody all the time. Take a break. Take a day off. Take a vacation. Take a sabbatical.

4. If you listen to God, people will listen to you.
People don’t need a word from me. They need a word from God. I want my messages to have a prophetic edge to them and that happens when I get into the presence of God. The presence of God is where problems are solved and dreams are conceived. Get in the presence of God. At the end of the day, I am nothing without God’s anointing. I need to keep an ear tuned to the people; but, more importantly, I need to keep an ear tuned to the still small voice of the Holy Spirit.

5. Don’t let your budget determine your vision.
Too often we allow our budget to determine our vision instead of allowing vision to determine our budget. That doesn’t mean you hire lots of staff you’ll need to fire. It doesn’t mean you let expenses get out of control. It does mean that you hold tenaciously to this simple truth: when God gives a vision, He makes provision. You need to budget in a way that gives God the room to do miracles. And make doubly sure that you have vision beyond your resources.

6. Everything is an experiment
One of the greatest dangers we face as leaders is unintentional blindness. We stop noticing our environment. When that happens we lose creativity, we lose excellence. You’ve got to make some mistakes! You’ve got to take some risks. Over time there is a cognitive shift from right-brain to left-brain: we stop doing ministry out of imagination and start doing it out of memory. Do something different. After all, if you want God to do something new then you can’t keep doing the same old thing.

7. If your life is interesting your messages will be interesting.
The reason why many of our messages lack impact is because they aren’t interesting and they aren’t interesting because we’re not interesting. Get a life! You need a life outside of church. Go on an adventure. Take up a hobby. Learn something new.

8. Don’t just dream big. Think long.
We tend to overestimate what we can accomplish in 2 years, but we underestimate what we can accomplish in ten years. Zoom out. Your mantra shouldn’t be “as soon as possible.” It should be “as long as it takes.” Your vision isn’t just too small. It’s too short.

9. Put your family first
At the end of the day, I want to be famous in my home. God has not called me to sacrifice my family on the altar of ministry. They deserve my best. Don’t let work become home and home become work. Success for me is my kids growing up to love God with all of their heart, soul, mind, and strength. Your youth pastor isn’t called to disciple your kids. You are. You’ll make mistakes, but the secret to successful parenting is this: keep trying, keep forgiving, keep loving.

10. Who you’re becoming is more important than what you’re doing.
Don’t worry about church growth. Focus on personal growth and church growth will take care of itself. Stay humble. Stay hungry. Make sure you’re doing ministry out of the overflow of what God is doing in your own heart, your own life. Remember that who you are is more important than what you do. People over programs…people over portfolios.

11. Work like it depends on you. Pray like it depends on God.
Failing to plan is planning to fail. So plan away. And loving God with all of your strength = a great work ethic. So work hard. But I believe in prayer-storming more than brainstorming. Prayer is the difference between you fighting for God and God fighting for you. If work is the engine of success, then prayer is the high-octane fuel.

12. If you have something to say, say it.
My greatest regret looking back over fifteen years of preaching? Simple: I wish I had communicated the gospel more consistently and more clearly. I should have said it and said it again and again and again. You cannot over-communicate. Say it. Then say it over and over again. Say it in different ways. As a multi-site church we have a mantra: when in doubt, CC. Another mantra is this: don’t internalize, verbalize. I don’t want to hear about issues when they’ve become full-blown problems with collateral damage. Internalizing issues only makes them worse. And I don’t want to hear it from a third-party. If you have something to say, say it.

13. Be Yourself
Don’t try to be who you’re not. I’m not trying to be a pastor anymore. I’m trying to be myself. I’m certainly trying to grow in maturity and gifting, but I’m not worried about who I’m not. Abraham Lincoln said, “You can please all of the people some of the time, some of the people all of the time, but you can’t please all the people all of the time.” Uniformity isn’t the goal. Unity is. That also doesn’t mean unanimous. According to the categorization of adopters, 16% of the people you lead will be resisters.
It doesn’t matter if you come down with stone tablets from Mount Sinai. Even Jesus lost one of his disciples.

14. Don’t live for the applause of people.
My philosophy of ministry is Matthew 10:16: Be shrewd as a snake and innocent as a dove. You’ve got to beat the enemy at his own game and that takes creativity. But you also need to do the right things for the right reasons and that takes integrity. Don’t worry about being politically correct. Be biblically correct. Most of my reward has been forfeited because I was more concerned about “my kingdom” than “thy kingdom.” I was living for the applause of people. To get to the point where you genuinely care for people you have to get to the point where you don’t care how they feel about you. Live for the applause of nail-scarred hands.

15. I’d rather have one God idea than a thousand good ideas.
Let me say it again: get in the presence of God. Those new ideas are discovered in the context of prayer and fasting and nowhere else. Good ideas are good, but God ideas change the course of history. There are ways of doing church that no one has thought of yet. Here’s a formula: change of pace + change of place = change of perspective. Sometimes you just need to get out of your routine.

16. Be what you want
If you want to receive honor then you need to give honor. If you want a generous culture, then you’ve got to give sacrificially. Set the example. Set the bar. At the end of the day, the strengths and weaknesses of any organization mirror the strengths and weaknesses of the leadership. Take responsibility for it. Then take action.

17. Enjoy the journey
If you are too focused on the future you’ll fall into the when/then syndrome. When we have “this many people” or “this much money” I’ll be able to enjoy leadership. No you won’t. You need to enjoy every stage. For the record, it will only get harder. It will only get more complicated. Sin will complicate your life in negative ways. Blessings will complicate your life in positive ways. When I got married it complicated my life. Praise God. We have three complications named Parker, Summer and Josiah. I can’t imagine life without those complications. So count the cost and keep on keeping on.”

by Tim Challies

With a friend I’ve been reading through R. Kent Hughes’ book Disciplines of a Godly Man. This week we read the section titled “Relationships.” This section is comprised of 4 chapters and offered all kinds of good food for thought. I wanted to point out just one brief excerpt that kicked me in the gut. It comes in a section discussing “The Discipline of Marriage.” Here is what hesays:Men, we are called to a divinely appointed self-love: to love our wives as our own bodies, to care for them as Christ does the Church. Loving our wives’ bodies as our own demands a triple incarnation: physical, emotional, and social. We are to devote the same energy, time, and creativity to our wives as to ourselves. We are to cherish our constant souls. Envy the woman who is loved like this. Even more, envy the man who loves like this—for he is likeChrist.

Men, what a challenge Ephesians 5 presents us—sacrificial love (love is like death!), sanctifying love (love that elevates), and self-love (loving your wife as much as you love your own body). If this calls for anything, it calls for some holy sweat. As Walter Trobisch said, “Marriage is not an achievement which is finished. It is a dynamic process between two people, a relation which is constantly being changed, which grows ordies.”
We are to devote the same energy, time, and creativity to our wives as to ourselves. That one line convinced and convicted. And that was just one line in a longbook.

Originally posted at http://www.challies.com/quotes/energy-time-creativity

 Stress comes in two forms, healthy and unhealthy.  Unhealthy stress in our lives is destructive while healthy stress moves us toward glorifying God.  Faith in the Good News of the Bible removes unhealthy stress from our lives.  This stress resides in us because we are trying to do what God has already done for us.  Consider the following ways that the Gospel breaks up unhealthy stress in our lives:

1. Understand the purpose of trials - Romans 8:28, Psalm 90:15, Job 2:10, Psalm 119:67,75-76
2. Understand the value of patience- Romans 5:3-5, B.B Warfield Faith and Life
3. Correct or train our children but don’t crush their spirit - Proverbs 18:14
4. Learn to live with rest not exhaustion - Psalm 127: 1-2
5. In marriage, do not entertain the possibility of divorce - Malachi 2:16
6. Speak one another’s love language - 5 Love Languages
7. Maintain emotional consistancy - Galatians 5:19-21
8. Reinforce Biblical teaching with discipline - Leviticus 11:22, 1 Pet. 2:11-12

Am I open to other people’s ideas?

Do I listen more than I talk?

Am I open to changing my opinion based on new information?

Do I readily admit when I am wrong?Do I observe before acting on a situation?

Do I ask questions?

Am I willing to ask a question that will expose my ignorance?

Am I open to doing things in a way I haven’t done before?

Am I willing to ask for directions?

Do I act defensive when criticized, or do I listen openly for truth?

http://www.desiringgod.org/blog/posts/paul-tripp-on-the-heart-of-parenting#ooid=JidWloMjpB16tMUVYih1CD3mdXs5ofEO

I think the Bible has the answer - You'll never be an expert at parenting but expertise is NOT the point!  Consider this quote by Kevin DeYoung:

I just know that the longer I parent the more I want to focus on doing a few things really well, and not get too passionate about all the rest. I want to spend time with my kids, teach them the Bible, take them to church, laugh with them, cry with them, discipline them when they disobey, say sorry when I mess up, and pray like crazy. I want them to look back and think, “I’m not sure what my parents were doing or if they even knew what they’re were doing. But I always knew my parents loved me and I knew they loved Jesus.” Maybe it’s not that complicated after all.

Yeah!  It's really not that complicated.  It may be difficult rather than easy but it is not complicated.  Love God well and love your children to Him.  That's the point of the new teaching series beginning May 22 called Parenting Isn't for Experts.

 I hope to see you there!

We Christians constantly need to remind ourselves that “The Son of Man came to seek and to save the lost” (Luke 19:10). Amid all the good things that missionaries are called to do, they should never forget that their essential task is to seek out those who will humbly confess their sins and throw themselves upon the mercy of God available in Christ Jesus. And among all the needs for which missionary intercessors might pray, they should pray that missionaries will be successful in that search.
After all, the reason for Jesus’ coming is the reason for their going.

(Paradigms in Conflict, 137-38).